questions and answers about some stuff
q: why are you back?
tumblr doesnt have great moderation either (transphobia/intersexism) and so moving over there as if it was better was misguided. every platform has its problems, its just a matter of which ones i can deal with. also only having one or two accounts on social media to me makes it seem like i like or endorse those specific platforms whereas have multiple shows that im spreading my presence in as many places as possible, except for ones i have obvious things against (meta, twitter, etc). also if one gets nuked theres always the other, you know?
q: where are all your old videos?
i privated them all out of embarrassment. they were not good.
q: i noticed theres no twolab on tumblr. what happened?
deleted it. i have no way of verifying if they are scams or not. (though there has been evidence of social media accounts that were some other type of scam converting into scams about gaza.) there has also been language and images in the posts that may hurt those with certain mental illnesses, neurodivergencies, or disabilities (moral ocd, for example). am i going to say its wrong when people in literal danger for their lives show graphic imagery or use language that implies a moral obligation to donate? no, of course not, they are doing whatever they can to get money they need. however, it has consequences that are unintentional. these actions are definitely wrong however, if it is a scammer. i encourage you to donate to verified organizations which i will add links to in a pinned post on my new account.
q: new account? whats this all about?
i am either changing or deleting the accounts that have "blulab" in them as i am rebranding. when this will occur is up in the air as i want to wait until i can create content again before i do. i have a username picked out and a new pngtuber. i want to make this change when im serious about content creation. like really serious.
q: cool, so whens that?
fuck if i know, but not soon. i dont have the time between work, relationships, school, and therapy to do that, and i dont have the environment i used to have to create stuff. and i feel like i need to do more studying and consideration about if this is really my path, and how to best do it seriously. as like a serious thing. with like *real* videos instead or random bullshit, you know?
q: so what are you doing with the blulab accounts (bluesky/tumblr) now?
99% hearting, 0.9% reposting and 0.1% actually posting. and eventually this bluesky account will be deleted, mostly because i blocked too many people. as it turns out, "people i disagree with mildly and anyone who follows them" and "people i should never ever interact with again" are not the same.
q: i noticed you say youre a system at the very bottom of your tumblr bio. are you diagnosed? whats your stance on syscourse? what system origin do you have? how long have you known? why do you admit it but hide it at the bottom of things like this post? which dissociative disorder do you have? why are you using i/me instead of we/our?
*squishes the imaginary character asking these questions with a hydrolic press*
this information is something i try to keep private 99.999999% of the time. however, sometimes, once in a blue moon i might say something about my experiences and so i put that there so that people dont think im a singlet trying to jump in on something i shouldnt. im still figuring things out, and i often go through phases where my brain is like "you dont have any mental illnesses or neurodivergencies at all, youre just faking like a bitch" despite evidence to the contrary. we use we/our when nobodys around automatically irl and it feels nice, like taking a mask off in a way. but when we're in public or online we default to i/me cause thats something weve always had to do to not look weird.