Tag: autobiography
One Day, Everyone Will Have Always Been Against This
It is a hallmark of failing societies I’ve learned, this requirement that one always be in possession of a valid reason to exist. This is a haunting, beautifully written book and the framing implicit in the title and what the book posits is that you're either against the reality of what's happening now or will be given the numbness and separation that comes with time. Will you take that stand now while you can make a difference? Will you stand to risk and lose so much less than what so many have already lost? These are seen as difficult questions but they aren't, really, given the scale of the tragedy in Gaza. One day, when it’s safe, when there’s no personal downside to calling a thing what it is, when it’s too late to hold anyone accountable, everyone will have always been against this. I'd like to believe that calling this event a genocide, an accurate description, isn't dissent or transgression or declaration of allegiance. It's a recognition that loss of life is fundamentally tragic, on all sides. Opposition to loss of life and mass human suffering isn't an endorsement, it's a necessary stance in the face of so much tragedy. Loss on one side does not justify wanton violence being inflicted on those of whom the perpetrators hide among. But, for now, we argue, in this part of the world, the part not reduced to rubble, about how words make us feel. The author deftly weaves this tragedy together with vignettes from his own life, it's vaguely narrative and a bit dreamlike. It's grounded in his experience and understanding of the world and his perspective of feeling out of place both by being who he is and knowing what he believes. It's overwhelming to know what's happening is tragic and maddening to know that, while it's discussed, nothing is done. Words are exchanged and no action is taken. Whose non-existence is necessary to the self-conception of this place? And how uncontrollable is the rage whenever that non-existence is violated? So, yes, mourn what has been lost on all sides. But that recognition does not absolve you of the responsibility to take action while suffering continues unabated.
Punk Paradox
Greg Graffin's Punk Paradox is an interesting, winding read that works well as a compliment to Do What You Want . The latter gives you a full view of Bad Religion 's history, this gives you a full view of Greg's. Greg has been the only constant member of the band for its decades-long history, so it's a valuable perspective. Bad Religion was a gateway band for me that introduced me to punk music through melody and intelligent lyrics. Multipart vocal harmonies, societal commentary and fast paced drumming. I distinctly remember being enthralled by No Control , Against the Grain , The Process of Belief and The Empire Strikes First — I somehow didn't hear Suffer until years later and I don't have any memory or excuse as to why that took me so long. I set them aside and spent time listening to other bands, but always appreciated their importance to the punk genre and to me personally. They're one of those bands I'm nostalgic about and have embraced whole-heartedly. Graffin is the child of two academics, two loving parents split between his home state of Wisconsin and Los Angeles. His parents separated, but they're both clearly loving, devoted parents that provided for their kids. He himself is an academic and it feels like his entry into punk is a bit of happenstance helped along by the friends he made as a teenager growing up in LA. He had a knack for music, singing in particular, participated in the scene, spun up a band and off they went. There were plenty of things here that I knew or had read elsewhere, but I loved the small details — the privileged academic nerdiness of referring to your parents' homes as different campus locations, how his academic pursuits dovetailed with how far members of Bad Religion found themselves living from one another, finding success in Europe (Germany in particular), dealing with management and on and on. I would've enjoyed more recording and album by album deep dives, but that's not the story Graffin chose to tell. If you love Bad Religion , there's no separating Greg from it and this is an essential read. If you're a more casual observer, go with Do What You Want instead. : I was always an engaged listener, never a punk and always a nerd. : Those post-Atlantic reunion albums with Brett are all killer.
The House of My Mother
A compelling, empathetic and flawed read. It certainly draws you in, but much of the detail of the author’s experience(s) with her mother is surface level. You know there’s more there, you can feel it, but it’s left unsaid. It’s a pattern that repeats itself throughout that book. What is fair to say is that the guarded nature of the narrative is justified given the spotlight on the family and the nature of the abuse. I’ve never understood family blogs or vlogs — the folks that make them or the voyeurism on the other end of that relationship. It’s peculiar. There’s a clear need for attention on the part of those that start those projects. Ruby certainly craved it. Narcissists need attention and her daughter describes her as such. But that approach to social media and broadcasting often reduces the subjects to props. Let kids be kids, right? An overbearing, narcissistic mother, a subservient father, a manipulative councilor, an abusive older man, a church that offers little guidance and no help. The author ends up free of all but the last (well, her dad appears to turn the corner). Hopefully she’s doing well.
Above the Noise
DeMar is one of those classic "fuck fuck fuck stay in front of him — oh god he's in the paint — fuck put your hand up — nice defense, oh shit he made it anyways" guards. Stay in front of him, make the game as hard as you can but know that he's going to get to his spots regardless. Hope whoever's guarding him has fresh legs and the refs let the game go without too many calls. DeMar is also one of the first (perhaps the first?) players to speak up on the topic of mental health. An off the cough tweet about depression kicked off a welcome reaction among fans, players and the rest of the league. DeMar, then Kevin Love and on and on. Players past and present. It's respectable, commendable and difficult to face up to. He was (and is) an incredible player. He moulded his game after Kobe Bryant and — while he never reached the same heights on the floor — is dynamic and relentless in his own way. Basketball as a career, basketball as an escape from Compton. I wish — I wish — we had traded for him, not Russell Westbrook. Anyways. DeMar isn't perfect and he doesn't claim to be, but he's clearly honest, thoughtful and a dedicated father.
Can I Say
I really wanted to love this, but I only kind of like it. blink-182 are one of my favorite bands and Travis is an incredible drummer, who has been through quite a lot, but I didn't find myself particularly engrossed or engaged with this. There are quite a few notches in the bed post, some personal trauma and interesting anecdotes, but I may have gone into this looking for the wrong things. I was looking for a bit more blink-182 and there wasn't much of that. I should've left my expectations at the door. I will say that we saw Travis backstage at a show once, my wife went up to him and told him how much his music meant to her and he listened, told her thank you and gave her a huge hug. He's a good dude.
There's Always This Year
This is about so much more than basketball. I picked it up for the basketball connection (and I'm glad I did) and it uses the structure of a game (quarters, timeouts, asides) to guide Abdurraqib's love and conflicted relationship with his home. It is about basketball. Inasmuch as your life, moments, memories, social conventions, childhood – whatever — are about basketball. LeBron leaves. Hanif leaves. They both come home. "To anyone who never wanted to make it out of the places that love them."
Cured: The Tale of Two Imaginary Boys
I am the very definition of a casual fan of The Cure . I have the utmost respect for them but, you know how there are those bands that you enjoy and know are important but don't fall in love with? The Cure are one of those bands for me. I went into this with an open mind having enjoyed the highlights of their discography expecting a rote retelling of their history. What I got was a wonderfully crafted narrative by founding member Laurence Tolhurst who deftly told the band's history alongside his own personal struggles. Alcoholism, loss — all of it. Lol went through (and put himself — and even the rest of the band) the wringer. He recovered and came out of the other side of so much relatively alright. It's a wonderful read and Lol shares everything lovingly and honestly. He doesn't hide from his personal failings nor anything related to the band. Great read.
This Isn't Happening
Another compelling exploration of a unique and important album by Steven Hyden. I didn’t “get” or appreciate Radiohead until well after Kid A came out but it’s now one of the first Radiohead albums I’ll reach for. Hyden capably explores the album’s creation, reception and impact, framing it within his perception of the band at the time and that of fellow fans. Exploring albums like Kid A in the context of their impact — rather than a sterile retelling of their creation — does a lot to drive home the connections fans have with the music and makes for a great read. I really enjoy how Hayden approaches albums in this fashion. I look forward to reading about whichever album he chooses next.
Challenger
I grew up after the Challenger tragedy occurred and — as such — didn't have a personal connection or framing for the disaster. Higginbotham does an outstanding job crafting a narrative, humanizing the victims of the disaster and ruthlessly layout out the evidence. The aspirations embodied in the space shuttle program and its astronauts were admirable but the pace, willful disregard for highlighted safety concerns and a demonstrably unsafe focus on the pace with which the program was pushed led to disaster (and who knows how many others were barely avoided).
NOFX: The Hepatitis Bathtub and Other Stories
Pack a barf bag and an open mind. A bizarre and interesting read — I'm glad they're alright (sounds like they're lucky that's the case).
Columbine
Dave Cullen's investigation of the Columbine tragedy makes for a compelling read and I say this as someone aware of the tragedy but also as someone who hasn't studied it in detail outside of this reading. It's a hard book to read and it's hard to put down. Cullen spares no time diving into a detailed description of the tragedy, filling out the rest of the book with an investigation into Harris and Klebold's motives and history, the failings of the police department on the day of and after the events and the far-reaching ramifications of it all. The victims are given ample team and treated with care (as they well should be). Cullen doesn't speak to or — really — mention any bullying that the perpetrators may have been subject to but, frankly, given what they did, it's hard to care. Their actions were monstrous and, while understanding motives may be worth pursuing for the sake of being thorough, they're utterly undeserving of any sympathy. There's not really any room — in my mind — for criticizing the author for failing to humanize them when they quite clearly saw their victims as anything but.
Do What You Want
A capable and thorough retelling of Bad Religion's history — it touched on many things I didn't know about the band or hadn't previously explored. I do remember wandering through record stores in my cross buster t-shirt picking up their discography bit by bit. They're influential and one of the longest-running bands among their peers. The book itself is well written, but doesn't escape the band's own retelling of their history, for better or worse. Highly recommended for fans of the band, casual or otherwise — I found myself listening to their albums more as I made my way through it and taking the time to check out some of their newer material that they cover at the tail end of the book.